This past weekend I attended an engagement party one night, and dinner party birthday the next. These acted as reminders that, yes, although I often practice avoidance in all avenues of maturity and romance my contemporaries do not waste time finding their own complimentary significant others.
I can now say I know three awesome couples in Kaohsiung in which I enjoy both members individually and as a unit. It gives me something to look forward to, like a barbeque fire on the roof in a typhoon that stays lit despite all odds. At the same time these important moments emphasize the idea that compromise is essential, but only to a certain extent.
We want to find someone that understands how we work. Someone that knows when I say, “I will give you time to pack.” I really mean, “Hurry up and clean the living room or I will cut you.” Alternately when I say, “The dishes can wait until morning,” I really mean it. I hate doing dishes after the meal, and I like doing them when I wake up in the morning.
No one wants to give too much or too little. And it is wonderful to see couples together that have found that balance without bitterness. People that remain friends inspite of the lack of privacy that successful relationships require.
I feel honored to know them, and always that aftertaste, a nostalgic pang like the last taste of wine when you realize your time together as friends is fleeting.
My friend groups here in Taiwan are exceptionally transient, both the foreigners and Taiwanese because those are the kind of people I like: adventurous, mildly unpredictable, accepting and entertaining. I love them because of these factors and I will miss them just the same when they leave to their ‘Next New Adventure.’
Unfortunately, I have little confidence in our abilities to stay in touch, even with emails and Facebook, Instagram and the rest. Travelers live in the present, and although they reminisce about the past the majority of their energy is spent making new memories.
So I will try to preserve these friendships in writing, adding a safeguard to my memories, some sort of false sense of preserving the non preservable.
K and J I wish you all the best wine in Spain. S and R I will miss our music classes and art talks. S and P I hope you enjoy your trip back to France, your spice collection fills me with great appreciation. If I ever get around to growing up, I want to be just like you.